Making sense of overwhelm
How often do you wake up with a to-do list swirling around in your head? You feel behind before the day has started and you can’t seem to get “caught up?”
I feel it. My clients feel it. And the feeling has intensified in 2020.
I don’t know anyone engaged in the world, committed to making change happen, who has not experienced overwhelm. When we’re in its clutches, we may feel like running away, numbing with food, or scrolling through our social media feed for distraction.
What’s overwhelm like for you? For me, overwhelm feels like my body is paralyzed and my mind is spinning. I don’t know where to start, what to focus on, or what to let go of.
When do you get overwhelmed? For me, I tend to become overwhelmed when I allow the hyper-achiever to take control of what I say YES to. I end up taking on projects that are not aligned with my values, and I procrastinate working on them. At other times, there are external forces outside of my control that add things to my to-do list. Sometimes I’m just tired.
How do you manage overwhelm?
I have previously written about procrastination and developing new routines. In this post, I would like to share some tips to consider to help you get unhooked when you are feeling overwhelmed:
Step 1: Arrive into the present moment of overwhelm.
Step 2: Become curious about the emotion or feeling underneath the overwhelm. Is there fear, anxiety, uncertainty, frustration, sadness? Tune into the part of your body where you feel this most strongly. Is your heart racing? Is there a pressure sensation in your chest? How’s your breathing? Try to be with what’s going on for a few moments. This takes practice, so if you have trouble identifying the precise emotion or you don’t know where you’re feeling it, just notice that.
Step 3: Accept this emotion or feeling without judgement. Ask how it may guide you to the next right move‡. For example, if the feeling is predominantly anxiety, the next right move might be to do something on your to-do list that feels easy.
Step 4: Place your entire focus, without distraction, on this next right move. The focus and concentration tend to settle the mind.
Step 5: When the mind and body feel more settled, take the opportunity to review your schedule and to-do list.
How do your schedule and to-do list align with your values?
How does each task, event, or meeting support you feeling fulfilled and happy?
What are your intentions for the day/week/month/year?
What can you let go of, delegate, leave undone, or delete?
Overwhelm will come and go. Try not to beat yourself up for experiencing it. Instead, become curious, be kind to yourself, identify the next right thing, and keep moving in the direction of your dreams.
Footnote:
‡ HT to Susan David, PhD